The First Look Debate: Pros, Cons, and Unexpected Wins
When it comes to wedding traditions, few things spark as much discussion as the first look. Some couples want the aisle moment to be the very first time they see each other, while others are open to a quiet, private reveal before the ceremony.
So what’s the right call?
Well, like most things with weddings, it depends. But after capturing dozens of weddings from both approaches, here’s a breakdown of the pros, cons, and some unexpected wins that might help you decide what feels right for your day.
What Is a First Look, Exactly?
It’s when the couple chooses to see each other before the ceremony, usually in a quiet, private moment with just the photographer (and maybe videographer) nearby. Think: less audience, more intimacy.
The Pros: Why Couples Choose a First Look
1. It Calms the Nerves
If the idea of 100 people watching you as you try to keep it together sounds like a nightmare, a first look can be a real game changer. It gives you both a chance to breathe, hug, laugh, and let the emotions land before the pressure’s on.
2. You Get More Time Together
Your wedding day flies by. Like, gone in a blink fast. A first look buys you back 30–60 minutes of real time together. That’s a win you’ll feel at the end of the night.
3. You Bank Photos Early
You can knock out your couple portraits, bridal party shots, and sometimes even family photos before the ceremony. That means you get to enjoy the cocktail hour instead of spending it posing for photos.
4. Your Hair and Makeup Are Fresh
Just saying. If you’re walking through a windy field later on, you’ll appreciate having photos done while everything is still perfectly in place.
5. You Get Two Emotional Moments, Not One
Some worry it will “ruin” the aisle moment. Spoiler: it doesn’t. The first look is emotional in its own way, it’s often more raw and relaxed. And when you walk down the aisle later, it’s still just as powerful, only now you’re not fighting off tears while also holding in nerves.
The Cons: Why Some Couples Skip It
1. You’re Breaking Tradition
If you’re sentimental about the moment of seeing each other for the first time at the altar, a first look might not be for you, and that’s totally okay.
2. It Means Getting Ready Earlier
You’ll need to be ready around 1–2 hours earlier than usual, depending on your timeline. For morning weddings or tight turnarounds, this can be a squeeze.
3. Lighting Might Not Be Ideal
If your ceremony is late afternoon and the first look is midday, the sun might be harsh. A good photographer will handle this, but it’s something to consider.
Unexpected Wins from Couples Who Did a First Look
“It was the only time we had to ourselves all day.”
“He cried at the first look and still cried again at the ceremony.”
“It turned out to be my favourite memory, just us, no one else watching.”
“We actually got to attend our own canapés.”
First looks don’t just change the schedule, they change the emotional rhythm of the day. The biggest surprise for many couples? How grounding it feels. That moment helps ease the nerves and reminds you what the day is actually about: the two of you.
So... Should You Do a First Look?
Here’s a quick gut check:
Do you value privacy over tradition?
Would having more time with each other (and less pressure) make your day feel better?
Do you want to maximise your time with guests and not rush through photos?
If yes, a first look could be the secret ingredient to a smoother, more relaxed day.
But if you’ve always dreamed of that aisle moment, the big reveal with everyone watching, then skip it, and plan for a photo-friendly buffer between ceremony and reception instead.
There’s no right answer, just the one that makes you feel most you.
